LIKE NEVER BEFORE

Seems just yesterday,
When happiness hugged me,
Seems just moments ago,
When happiness kissed me,
Now, My Life takes a turn,
My life is now how it was never before,
Sadness is my pocket,
Tears in my wallet,
Gloom on my eyes,
Making it hazy for me to see, like never before.

The Shine of “ME” “MYSELF”
Is clouded by the wrath of the world,
It just seems that future never existed for me,
The Smile, I lived with,
Now I can never show,
The zest to live my life is now subdued,
By the zest to go deep down under.

I feel this sea of sadness has filled the shores of my life,
With pain and filth I experience, Like never before,
My words stay deep in my heart,
They never come out even if I tear myself apart,
The box wants to open,
The box wants to break,
But The Key is lost,
Its like everything in my life has gone for a toss.

With the good turning bad,
With people turning their backs,
With dark pushing out the light,
With myself, I cannot fight,
With smiles fading away.
My life just seems to be like one it was never before.

My eyes wanting to see,
Someone who could be called “mine”,
But the words just dry up,
Making me feel like using mime,
With lady luck always against me,
I fight with her to create my own destiny,
But she always gives me a stern glance,
Which is always used against me as a common parlance,
But this is what my life is now,
Its become like one I have never experience before.

I am so far away from myself,
I want to reach myself,
I want to find myself,
Show myself the mirror to look at himself,
I look through every cupboard of my heart,
Every dusty closet of my memory,
But I can’t find the trace of ME,
I find myself in the dust and filth,
Image of me shattered like pieces of mirror,
My jaw drops down in horror,
But that’s how I am now, Like never before.

I look for places to go,
I look for beaches to relax,
I look for people to meet,
But I realize I am too into and deep,
I don’t know whether I can breath again,
Because swimming in sadness was something very new for me,
Its my fight against myself,
Its my fight with the time,
I realize that everything that I hold on to is not mine and can never be mine.

These are my words, 
Never been so cursed,
My words lack the finesse now,
The want to stay down under the sea,
I lie asleep wanting to say goodbye,
And die with lack of breath becomes stronger,
The wish to torture, the wish to put myself into shackles,
Its likes wishes I never had before

I was fighter, not a crook,
I was an animal, not a beast,
It’s the triumph of the evil,
And loss of the good,
I succumb to this pain,
Because without pain there is no gain,
This is my life; it was never like this before